Skip to main content

My Friend(s)

I have a friend, they like to sit on my shoulder and sing to me. They like to laugh and joke and make people laugh. They always are willing to stop everything to help a person in need and do anything to make them better.

My friend loves life and wants nothing more then to talk to people and make they happy.

But...

I have another friend. This one Also sits on my shoulder but shows up when I'm alone. It whispers thought and tells me things no one wants to ever head. It will start yelling and screaming anytime, even if I'm not alone. It makes me cry and want to scream myself with all of the things it tells me.

It never wants to be awake and it does anything to never leave. It takes 'naps' that last 5 hours because it makes the pain stop.

These 'friends' are the two sides of me, depression and the fake side. No matter how hard I try, most of the time I must fake it and live my life. I must cover up the depression and fake it so my family hurts less.

The only problem is, I've faked it so long, the depression might be the real me.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Rain

The rain fell, making the ground wet and pools of water fulled the floor; I tried to walk but I kept falling back, starting all over again. The rain seemed to fall for an eternity, never stopping; Some days more rain fall, making me cold and alone. After a while, I learned to live with the rain along with the cold and the feeling of always being alone. I began to become numb and stopped trying to fight the rain, letting it fall as it pleased.  I sat and pondered about the rain, wondering why it took my happiness away and fulled my life with sorrow. I know I should be happy and joyfull but How can I be when the pain is so painful? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A/N: What does the rain mean to you? (Answer in the comments!❤️)

Introduction

First of all, my names Brittney but people call me Sin. If you knew me, you would too think I'm mean and heartless. I live in America and I’m also a poet and that is what I'll be posting for the most part. Even though my name is Sin, I will be not putting my name anymore but instead, I will be putting [-The Voice of Much Madness]. If you would like to know why keep reading. Now, I won’t say my whole story but I will say this, for over a year now depression, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts have been taking over my brain. Know, I don’t want any of you to be thinking ‘stay strong’ or any of that shit; I AM okay. I have been told it all and I’m looking for any of that thank you. Now, I am starting this blog to talk about Mental Health but to also talk about things I feel strongly about. Why you may ask? I want to be heard! I want to let people know how I feel! I want to tell people its okay to tell how you feel. Some of my posts might be tips on depression/ anxiety while ...

You Have Nothing To Say

You ask me " Why do you want to give up? You have a unfathomable amount of good things coming your way! You have a good life, you are loved and cared for. You have no reason to give up ". This is true but my demons can come up with an infinity number of reasons why I should. One thing I wish you would understand is that this does not mean I will give up! I'm still sane enough to choice if I live or die. I am still thankful enough to sleep some nights. Now, I know others have it worse then me, some can't deal with their demons. I did not choice to feel this way and knowing others have it worse, makes me fell worse. Until you have been a prisoner in your own mind, until you have listened to your demons yell and scream until you get use to the noise, you have nothing to say. Live in my hell on earth, then ask " Are you okay? ".                                         ...